Not your father's sex shop
Adult stores clean up their act, seduce a new crowd
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TEMPE, Ariz. — I am taking lessons on sexual lubricants from Trista Windels, and it’s disconcerting.
Windels is a pretty, waifish 19-year-old blonde with startling green eyes who was raised in the tiny town of Detroit Lakes, Minn. I am older than her own father. Yet despite her growing up on a dairy farm and never having seen sex lube before last year, she has already told me at least three things (mostly having to do with the sensual opportunities presented by silicone) I didn’t know before beginning my training as a salesperson in the Fascinations “romance superstore” here.
I'm temping at the store to experience what it's like to peddle erotic goods for a living and find out who's shopping for them. At the moment, though, I am in the back stock room with my five fellow trainees, all under 25, all of whom have decided working in an adult store selling toys, lotions, lingerie, porn and bondage gear would be a great way to make some money. None of them are fazed by the idea. Not one bit.
In fact, if it weren’t for the shelves and boxes full of penis-shaped vibrators, a row of floggers and stacks of DVDs with titles like “The DaVinci Load,” Windels’ lecture could easily be taking place in the back room of a Nordstrom or a Lowe’s or a village antique store, for that matter. "This whole store is about customer service,” she drills between sips of Red Bull.
Wear your uniform (maroon polo shirt, black or khaki pants and black shoes) whenever you are on the floor. Name tags always. No freaky piercings that show. Be professional. We are, Windels tells us, “romance consultants.”
The message is clear: This is not your father's sex shop. It certainly doesn’t look like those old, scary joints. There’s a big, well-lit parking lot out front. The corporate headquarters of T.W. Lewis, a luxury home builder, sits next door. The rest of the street has mini-malls, a Wal-Mart, a Quiznos.
Satisfied customers
Inside, the 11,000-square-foot store, run by manager Rachel Miller, is white-glove clean and brightly lit. Except for the merchandise it appears to be like any other business in any other heavily stuccoed mecca of suburban consumer culture.
Which is precisely the idea. Adult stores — including chains with names such as Priscilla's in the heartland states, Hustler Hollywood in urban centers, and soon-to-open franchise outposts of the Adam & Eve mail-order empire — are trying to go mainstream because they have realized America loves the products but hates the dark, dank stores staffed by questionable characters.
And though it is little acknowledged, that strategy is succeeding. While nobody seems to keep a reliable count, industry insiders say the trend is up, evidenced, for example, by the fact that Fascinations already has 14 stores, with more on the way. Adam & Eve is hoping to open 27.
Shoppers aren't just the stereotypical dirty old men. “Sixty-four percent of our customers are female,” Windels tells us. “Fifty-eight percent are in a committed relationship. Twenty-one percent are dating, and 40 percent are college-educated.”
Still, when Windels takes us out onto the floor to begin our merchandise training, I can’t help thinking that if this is mainstream, we’ve taken a few twisty bends.
“BDSM [bondage and sadomasochism] DVDs do not generally have sex in them,” Windels, who has a rather restrictive definition of “sex,” explains as we wander the video aisles. “I did not know that, and then I rented one and was scared out of my mind.” She points out a few customer favorites. “Belladonna’s ‘My A** is Haunted.’ That’s a good one.”
The thrill of a new toy
When we turn to the toy section she explains how each one works, what it’s used for and who buys it. Pros and cons of each model are discussed. Usually we get the idea right away — most sex toys aren’t complicated. But certain models do confuse us and when Windels explains them her clarification is often some variation of “OK, now this goes in your butt.”
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An entire wall is filled with at least a hundred different vibrators. Glass cases contain stainless steel and glass dildos. Another wall has every conceivable kind of lubricant with flavors from several food groups.
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Mild items such as lingerie and lotions are placed at the front, we’re told, so that the further into the store you go, the more explicit the merchandise becomes. That way it’s possible to buy a sexy nightie and platform stripper shoes without ever catching sight of the rubber vaginas molded from porn stars.
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The next day, when I’m ready to hit the sales floor, I find that while a particular customer may not personally approve of one item or another (the comic books featuring incest plots generate some objections), nobody is outraged. Most people seem perfectly comfortable.
Ken Baker, a 40-year-old electrical engineer, comes in once in awhile with his girlfriend. “I’d buy stock in it if it was a public company,” he tells me. “They have a good selection, the people are pretty good, helpful … This is not sleazy. That is why I like this store.”
Kimberly Pikna-Nyhof, 32, a corporate training consultant and frequent Fascinations customer, says she often talks to her friends about new purchases the way she might exult over a great bargain on Jimmy Choos.
“I am proud of my vibrators and the trips I make to Fascinations! I am excited about it! You know, when you get a new toy when you’re young? You’re excited to play with it? Same thing when you’re an adult,” she says.
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