Soggy side effects put a damper on recovery

Flashback to the flagpole
I remembered an accident I had in the first grade. I wet my pants during a test. Instead of being allowed to call my mother and make a graceful exit, I was scolded and made to change into a pair of light blue corduroys in the principal’s office. Then my own jeans were hung, literally, on the flagpole to dry out while my 6-year-old ego was hung before all of Hacienda Elementary School. Two years later, when our family moved, my first thought was that kids at the new school would not know me first and foremost as a pants-wetter.

Somehow, my vivid recollection of this event almost 44 years later snapped me out of my self-pitying reverie and kept me moving toward the strip mall. I realized that walking a few miles for a latte was one of the lesser things I hoped to accomplish in the rest of my life. And I realized that I truly am the only person I have to worry about in this little equation.

Since that first walk three weeks ago, things have improved. It’s hard to tell, but there seems to be more of a warning sensation, more control. It makes sense. The catheter kept the plumbing wide open for 12 days so it will take some time for that alone to get back to normal. I’m choosing to believe that I’ll be in the vast majority of guys who grapple for a time with this, but not forever.

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In the meantime, my kegel exercises keep getting easier to do and I keep adding to the routine. And I’m trying not to use the I-word. Incontinence. That may be my old friend denial, but it sounds too damn medical and permanent to me.

I hope that next time I write about what’s going on with my body the news is better on this front. I can tell you that things are quite swell on a related matter, but we’ll save that for later.

MSNBC.com writer Mike Stuckey was diagnosed with prostate cancer in April. He is chronicling his battle in "Low Blow," a series appearing every other Wednesday. In the next installment, he distracts himself with a long list of dietary do's and don'ts.

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