When it comes to his wife and kids, Tom Cruise puts safety first. That’s why, according to In Touch Weekly, the “Mission Impossible” star tricked out his collection of automobiles with pricey extras that make seemingly everyday SUVs more like virtual tanks.

“It sounds like (Tom’s) taken a page out of one of his action movies,” an insider told the magazine. “A-list celebrities know they can’t be too careful. Tom’s vehicles look perfectly normal, but in reality they are more like armored trucks. He really, really loves his cars and he can afford the best.”

“The best” is said to include top-of-the-line rides with bulletproof windows and bombproof features. Tom’s concern for the well-being of Katie Homes and his three children even prompted him to ensure that each of his drivers train in defensive maneuvers. Of course, when possible, Tom prefers to be in the driver’s seat himself.

“Tom is a car nut,” the source said. “He has practical everyday cars, classic collectibles and high-powered sports cars like the Porsche 911 Turbo. Of course he loves every minute behind the wheel, but he’s not stupid and he’s not going to take any chances while he’s driving.”

Joel Madden starts his own rumors
As if frequent tabloid rumors predicting wedding bells for Joel Madden and Nicole Richie weren’t enough, the Good Charlotte frontman used his blog to start one of his own.

It turns out the post, which featured the title teaser “WE DID IT!! NICOLE AND I FINALLY GOT MARRIED!! Click here for the pictures!!” was just Joel’s attempt to fire back at Star magazine for a recent report proclaiming he and Nicole planned a lavish wedding ceremony. Once blog readers clicked the link, they were treated to a picture of two apes dress in traditional wedding garb.

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“HAHA, JUST KIDDING,” Joel wrote. “So I feel really stupid even posting this, but I’ve been getting calls and texts from my family all week asking me why they weren't invited to my wedding. I guess the only answer I could give them was that I didn’t know we were having one.”

From there the rocker shifted the blame where it belonged. “Its just star magazine,” he explained. “How long do you think it will be before they write we called it off, or we broke up? I give them a week or two…”

Dish on the fly
A dinner invitation from Lance Armstrong left his best gal, Kate Hudson, wanting more — food, that is. The New York Post’s Page Six reports Lance’s plan to treat Kate to a romantic meal at NYC landmark Rao’s might have been more successful if the cyclist made reservations months ago. Apparently Lance wasn’t aware that Rao’s exclusive regulars own their own tables. The rest, even celebrity it-couples, must plan ahead. … Chris Martin gave the cold shoulder to a BBC radio reporter when asked if the band’s latest release, “Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends,” had anything to do with the bands lyrical obsession with death. “I wouldn't agree with you there at all, no," Chris said in a quote published on BBC News. “I'd say you're journalistically twisting me into saying something I don't really mean.” Then the singer left the interview, as he was “not really enjoying” it. After drummer Will Champion answered a few questions, Chris returned to address the subject of whether or not the band found new musical territory, to which he said, “Um … yes ... yes, yes ... exactly.”

Tabloid Tidbits is compiled by Ree Hines.

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