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Japan Divorced Dads
Junji Kurokawa  /  AP
Divorcee Masahiro Yoshida, a 58-year-old musician, is among a small but growing number of divorced or separated fathers who have turned to the courts to get custody back, or at least gain a right to see their children.
updated 10/8/2009 12:04:05 PM ET 2009-10-08T16:04:05

On Christmas Eve two years ago, Masahiro Yoshida returned to his home to find it empty. His wife had fled with their 2-year-old daughter, seeking a divorce.

Since then, he's rarely seen his child because Japanese law grants custody to only one parent — almost always the mother. His wife has refused to allow him regular visits, accusing him of emotional swings and past verbal and sometimes physical abuse.

Yoshida, a 58-year-old musician, is among a small but growing number of divorced or separated fathers who have turned to the courts to get custody, or at least gain a right to see their children. More broadly, many are demanding a change in Japanese law to allow joint custody, as is the case in most developed countries.

"I think about my daughter all the time. I can't believe the courts allow this," said Yoshida, who admits hitting his wife twice but otherwise denies her claims. "This is a country that allows kidnapping."

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The law was thrown into the international spotlight last week when an American was arrested for allegedly snatching his children from his Japanese ex-wife as they walked to school in southern Japan. Christopher Savoie, a 38-year-old Tennessee man, remains in custody in the city of Fukuoka while prosecutors decide whether to press charges.

His case has received little attention in Japan, a reflection of how widely accepted it is that young children should remain with their mother in divorces or separations. The law doesn't explicitly say mothers should get custody — only that one parent should, and by cultural default, that's the mother.

A common issue
"In Japan, nobody thinks it's a problem if a mother takes away her children without consent," said Hideki Tani, a lawyer who has taken on cases of fathers seeking access to their children. "Here, it's common for either parent to completely lose contact with children, but people outside Japan find it outrageous."

Tani did acknowledge a need to address problems like domestic violence that can contribute to broken families.

Lately, the number of custody battles has risen as overall divorce cases have climbed and more men have become involved in child-rearing and homemaking. Divorced men also say that children should have a right to see their fathers — and that too often the kids' interests are neglected.

"Nobody thinks about children's well-being," Yoshida said. "They are the victims."

Last year, there were more than 20,000 child custody cases in Japanese family courts, up from less than 17,000 in 2000, Ministry of Justice statistics show. About 90 percent of those decisions favored the mothers — as in Yoshida's case.

In December, a court ruled against his petition for custody of — or rights to visit — his daughter, now 4, who lives with his ex-wife and her parents.

"I'm outraged by a society that allows this," Yoshida said.

His ex-wife, Akemi Kurahashi, 44, says she left Yoshida because she and her child needed legal protection from an abusive husband. She says most of it was verbal, but that once her eardrum burst when he hit her.

She twice left Yoshida, but returned when he begged and apologized, she said. Worn down, she eventually fled with their daughter that Christmas Eve when he was out performing with his jazz band.

Kurahashi says she is willing to consider letting him visit once a month on the condition he is emotionally stable and the visit takes place in public and in her presence. She is even open to the principle of joint custody in Japan, though she said the law must guarantee protection against domestic violence.

"I will swallow my own feelings if my daughter is happy seeing her dad," she said. "But I still fear he may end up hurting me or her someday."

Fathers retaliate
There have also been a few cases of fathers forcibly keeping children away from their ex-wives. In June, a 48-year-old man was arrested in Tochigi prefecture, northeast of Tokyo, after refusing to hand over his 3-year-old son to his wife, who had left them, despite a court decision that the son should be legally in the care of his former wife.

Yoshida has banded together with other divorced fathers to form a support group, one of several that have sprung up in recent years.

A few lawyers and lawmakers have showed support for their cause. A bar association group is studying parenting and visitation arrangements in other countries such as Australia.

Japan also faces a growing number of international custody disputes. The U.S., Britain, France and Canada have urged Japan to sign the 1980 Hague Convention on International Child Abduction, which has been signed by 80 countries. It seeks to standardize laws among participating countries to ensure that custody decisions can be made by appropriate courts and protect the rights of access of both parents.

Japan's government has argued that signing the convention may not protect Japanese women and their children from abusive foreign husbands. Foreign Minister Katsuya Okada said this week that officials were reviewing the matter.

Divorced fathers say that joining the Hague convention would be a major step toward bringing the possibility of joint custody to Japan because it would require a major overhaul of the country's family laws.

"For us it's not a diplomatic issue. It's a problem at home that Japan should correct," said Mitsuru Munakata, a 34-year-old freelance writer who has seen his 3-year-old daughter only twice in the last two years.

Although he recently won court permission for a two-hour meeting with his daughter every other month, he is concerned because his ex-partner is now remarried — and if she dies the custody right would go to her new husband.

"Then I'm totally out of the picture," Munakata said. "When I have an urge to see my daughter, I worry that I might get arrested someday."

Copyright 2009 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Video: American jailed in Japan over custody battle

  1. Closed captioning of: American jailed in Japan over custody battle

    >>> but we're going to begin with a father from tennessee who was behind bars in japan for trying to bring his children back home after they were illegally taken from him by his ex-wife. we're going to talk with that man's attorney and his current wife in a moment, but first, nbc's miguel almaguer has the details.

    >> reporter: christopher savoie and his children, isaac and rebecca , call tennessee home. so did their japanese mother, noriko, until this summer, when she suddenly moved to japan and took the children. divorced, christopher savoie had custody in the u.s., so he flew 7,000 miles to bring his kids home. but on monday, when he tried to walk the children into a u.s. consulate's office, he was arrested by japanese police , who charged him with abduction. scott sawyer also lost a son.

    >> it's difficult to think of him or look at his picture.

    >> reporter: when sawyer's wife left him, she took 3-year-old wayne to japan .

    >> it reminds me of the loss, so it is, is that i try to dedicate myself to working really hard toward getting him back, and that is what keeps me focused.

    >> reporter: sawyer and savoie 's children are not alone. according to congressman chris smith , 125 japanese american children are currently abducted by a parent who's fled to japan . the u.s. government is powerless to bring them home.

    >> japan is a modern civil rights oriented society, you know. it ought to join the rest of the industrialized nations and resolve all of these long-standing cases, including christopher savoie .

    >> i'd just like to talk to you about the children.

    >> reporter: the documentary "from the shadows" follows several american parents as they fight to bring their kids home from japan . the filmmaker says japanese abductions have happened for decades, a culture that does not recognize split- child custody like the u.s.

    >> they don't understand why the other parent wants to see or visit the kid after divorce. the norm in japan is to not do that.

    >> reporter: that's of little comfort to parents who have lost their children. according to one u.s. lawmaker, of the thousands of american kids taken to japan , not a single child has ever been returned by their government, a statistic that includes 3-year-old wayne sawyer.

    >> he's a great little guy.

    >> reporter: and now also 6-year-old isaac and 8-year-old rebecca savoie , as their father still sits behind bars . for "today," miguel almaguer, nbc news, los angeles .

    >> amy savoie is christopher savoie 's current wife. good morning to you, amy . thanks for joining us.

    >> good morning.

    >> i don't know if you've had a chance to talk to christopher since he's been arrested. have you had that opportunity and do you know how he's doing?

    >> i have not been able to speak to him since he told me they were coming with the handcuffs and they were telling him "turn off the phone, turn off the phone, turn off the phone." someone from the consulate told me he was taken to the hospital that night for low blood pressure concerns.

    >> he had had concerns for a while that his ex-wife was going to take the children back to japan , where she is from. he even tried to get a restraining order to stop her from doing that last march, and eventually, the judge overturned that, but did you have indications or warning signs at all along the way, amy , or did chris, that this was indeed going to happen?

    >> the warning signs were fair -- were extremely consistent, meredith. we were always treated as if our love for the children was valueless, was unimportant. we have e-mails from her where christopher 's saying, "can i see the kids for the fourth of july?" this was a while back, and she said, "of course not, it's a holiday. the children will be with me. i cannot accept that." and that was before their parenting plan was in place. it could have been more congenial and cooperative. she had always seemed to find christopher 's love for them and their love for him to be very threatening, very annoying.

    >> so, when she took the children in august, when he realized that they didn't show up for school and he realized that they were in japan , did she talk to him over the phone? did she say, you know what, we're not coming back?

    >> yeah, basically, yeah. she said, yeah, she abandoned her lease. she abandoned all of the children's belongings, things that were sentimental that he knew were sentimental to the children. he couldn't believe that she had left rebecca 's little black stuffed dog and all of isaac 's little matchbox cars and she spent, i guess, a few weeks transferring money appropriately and she had it all planned out. she picked the kids up from my house saying -- she sent me a text message, "i'm going to take them back-to-school shopping," and then it was going to be her custodial time. she picked the children up --

    >> and you snefer saw them again.

    >> and i never saw them again.

    >> when he told you that he was going to go to japan to try to get his kids back, obviously, that's a very drastic step to take. what did you think?

    >> i don't want to talk about that, meredith. i'm sorry.

    >> how are you holding up right now, amy ?

    >> i'm not holding up well at all. i want my husband to be out of jail. i think my husband needs to be out of jail and i'm worried about isaac and rebecca . and i'm worried about my children who miss their step siblings. and i know that isaac and rebecca love my children and they must miss them. one time i said to isaac when he was messing around with my son, i said "you guys behave just like brothers," and isaac looked at me and he smiled this huge smile and he goes, "we are brothers!" and you just can't rip them away from a loving relationship and think that it's not going to have an impact.

    >> amy , i know, i understand --

    >> our lives are just devastated. we're crushed.

    >> amy , i understand what a difficult time this is for you and i appreciate you talking with us this morning. thank you very much, amy .

    >> thank you.

    >> we're going to bring in christopher savoie 's attorney, jeremy morley . mr. morley , good morning to you.

    >> good morning.

    >> this for your client has to be a nightmare. first, his ex-wife abducts the children, which is a federal crime in this country. so, she's a fugitive.

    >> yes.

    >> then he goes to get them back, and we can debate whether that was a smart move, but then he is arrested in japan and he's charged with abduction. and in japan , the ex-wife is considered the victim. how likely is it that he will serve jail time there?

    >> we don't know, but he's in jail right now. we've got lawyers that are flying down to this small town in southern japan to meet with him. we're trying to get the best counsel we can. and it would be outrageous if he spends any jail time there, but he is in a very serious situation.

    >> we've talked about this before. i know you talked to the producer about this, that the big hitch in this case is that japan has not signed the hague convention on international child abduction . it doesn't honor that. and in any case like this in the past, a child has never been returned from japan . so, the odds are stacked against him.

    >> he knew that, and that's why he went there and tried to exercise some self help . i have probably 100 clients, americans, who have lost their kids to japan , and this is an untold story . it is a terrible problem, and it's not just that they haven't signed the hague convention . there's an utterly different concept about how to raise children and who should be in charge.

    >> what do you mean?

    >> well, in japan , there is no shared custody. it's not in their law, it's not in their society, it's not in their history, and the idea of a father participating in the life of a child when the mother has primary custody is alien.

    >> but do you think your client in retrospect was acting recklessly to do what he did, to grab the children as they're walking to school and race to the consulate?

    >> i think that the recklessness was we've known about this potential for a year. we've tried to get help.

    >> the potential that she would take the children.

    >> we knew she would take the children. i knew she would take the children. a year ago, we asked a court in tennessee to do whatever it could to stop this, and many judges don't take this seriously enough. it is an enormously dangerous situation.

    >> mr. morley , i sense the frustration in your own voice, having dealt with this with other clients as well.

    >> yes.

    >> what recourse do you have right now? who is out there that could possibly help you?

    >> we've got great lawyers there, but their hands are tied by a legal system that doesn't work. we need diplomatic help. we need the united states government to work with our allies and to explain the position of americans and people around the world as to why this kind of conduct is reprehensible.

    >> but to date, our government has not intervened in cases like this?

    >> they have -- the american government has tried somewhat. there have been efforts to encourage japan to sign, at least sign the hague convention , and we've worked with other countries to try to do that. there's a long way to go.

    >> you have not talked to your client, i take it.

    >> we can't get through. we've sent lawyers down there. they will be speaking to him today, but it's a very serious situation. he needs to be out of jail and these kids need to be taken care of.

    >> mr. morley , i appreciate your time this morning.

    >> thank you very much.

    >>> and now let's get a

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