>>>
with important information for both parents and teens on just how deadly
eating disorders
can be. 19-year-old
melissa
avrin lost her lengthy battle with bulimia last may. during her struggle,
melissa
kept a
journal writing
not only about her
pain and suffering
, but also her hopes and dreams. one of them -- to make a movie that would change lives. we're going to talk to
melissa
's mother in a moment who's now made her daughter's
dream come true
with a deeply personal documentary.
>>
i was sitting on the couch. she went through the fridge looking for something to eat. i knew that there was nothing there. i made sure of it. i thought she went to bed. then i hear something and i look outside and the bitter freezing cold, she's going through the garbage out on the curb looking for something to eat. i went outside, and i yelled her name. just the way she looked back at me. it was so empty. vacant. she was a deer in the headlights doesn't even explain it.
>>
i was thinking my daughter was dead. that's not supposed to happen. i couldn't believe it. i didn't -- didn't know what to think. i was in shock.
>>
i always believed that she really would be somebody who could recover, even though looking back, i realize the odds were stacked against her because of the level of her illness. but i never lost hope. and, you know, i
still believe
that she could have beaten it.
>>
someday, i'll love someone, i'll travel a lot, i'll make my family proud, i will make a movie. i will change lives.
>>
judy
avrin is
melissa
's mother, here with the therapist who encouraged
judy
to make the film. it is in the "new
york
times
" an article about this documentary. shortly after
melissa
died, you decided this tragedy has got to help other people. you even made a very difficult decision i think in her obituary. you wrote, "my daughter died of an
eating disorder
." a lot of parents wouldn't have done that. why did you do that?
>>
i felt it was so important to speak out on the problem with
eating disorders
. they're hidden. they're shameful. people don't want to talk about them. so they don't get treatment. people don't know early signs. they're not aware of them because they're not taught.
>>
you also had a history here. you'd suffered from an eating order for a long time.
>>
a long time.
>>
and worked yourself through it. but when
melissa
first started to show signs, were you in denial or did you immediately recognize there was a severe problem?
>>
the signs were subtle at first. so i didn't recognize that they were leading to something more significant. but i did
close my eyes
at
times
when she started losing a little bit of weight. the weight that she gained that is necessary for going through puberty.
>>
dana
, what was the severity of her condition? i mean you kind of dealt with her in
middle school
from what i remember. was it later than that?
>>
no, it was
high school
.
>>
high school
. what was the severity of her condition at that time?
>>
by the time
melissa
came to me, she had just gotten out of her first hospitalization. so she was pretty entrenched in her
eating disorder
behavior already. it was pretty severe already at that point.
>>
you realized she needed extensive therapy.
>>
she did.
>>
after
melissa
died,
judy
, you read her journal and what struck you about it?
>>
there was such depth of sadness and despair and darkness. but interspersed were these shots of hope and that she wanted a future. and she, more than anything, wanted to be a filmmaker and when i saw the page about some day i will make a film that will change lives, it set chills down my spine. but more importantly, i felt that i needed to share the journal with
dana
so that if she could read anything below the surface to help the next kid, the next family, i had to do it.
>>
dana
, was it your idea to actually make that dream of changing lives through a film come true?
>>
it was.
judy
called me right after
melissa
died and said would you mind if i just come an chat with you for a few minutes? i said of course not. she brought the journal with her and we shared it together. we had a cry and it was a really tough moment for us. but in reading the journal, i saw kind of
beneath the surface
, a peek into
melissa
's soul way greater than i was able to see in therapy. i said,
judy
, i think you have a movie here.
>>
robin, as a reporter we all want something good to come out of stories like this. i think you have a daughter who's 11?
>>
11.
>>
so
body image
is a real issue for young girls in this country. what do you think the coverage of this and the release of this documentary might do to shed light on this subject?
>>
well, i think that
melissa
's story is a parable of its own about a certain level of pathology that's severe and more prevalent than we realize. this disease has the highest
mortality rate
of any
mental illness
. that's not a statistic i was aware of before i started this. there would probably, i would argue, is not a woman in america who doesn't on some level wrestle with issues of food and body self-image so everyone can kind of relate to this story somehow, think about it in terms of our daughters and the message we're sending and there are boys who suffer from this as well.
>>
i know you're still working on the editing process. you'd like this documentary to be entered in some
film festivals
. while hopefully in the long term this does a lot of good, has it been very difficult to go through this process and relive the pain?
>>
it's been a very up-and-down emotional journey. i found that at
times
i was so skilled at channeled my emotions into the work of the film that i was almost physically pushing off the grief. but at the same time, it was such a powerful way to honor
melissa
and to speak out and the e-mails and messages that continue to pour in from people, truly around the world, thanking me for speaking out is the best validation i could ask for. it's also very important that i share that there are incredible resources available. the
national eating disorders association
, which i've become very involved in, is an extraordinary organization and they're providing tons of resources.
>>
we'll put some of those resources on our website as well.
>>
there's also an 800 help
line number
that people can call.
>>
it strikes me that this is a mother who could have been hiding under the covers. we would that forgiven her for that. instead, on monday she's going to
washington
to lobby congress.
>>
we wish you luck with that and our condolences to you also in your loss. thank you very much for
“ ”